The Guardians of Iran

Since the ascent of lunatic madman Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to the presidency of the Islamic terrorist republic of Iran, the Guardian has been the leading mainstream voice in defending the Iranian regime.
Starting with a series of denials regarding statements made by the mad leader on the Holocaust and on the elimination of Israel, they wanted to create the impression that mad Mahmoud may not have really said “wipe off the map” or may not have really denied the Holocaust.
Israel has been baring the brunt of demonization while Iran enjoys the support of an intellectually grotesque and dishonest campaign from the Guardian resulting in articles like “Iran needs the bomb” by media critic David Cox and Jonathan Cook’s piece explaining how happy Iranian Jews are at home (a piece also featured on David Duke’s site [Warning: neo-fascist/neo-Nazi web site, racist filth]). Amazingly, the Guardian even allowed suspected regime agents to ascend to contributor status only to cause embarrassment for the publication when one of these contributors started to leave the verbal padded room to come out and allege Jewish conspiracies infiltrating the UK government. Tehrankind77 was a mere preview of what was to come.
But this past summer has created a real dilemma for Guardinistas. Iran’s regime has been rejected by its own people. The regime went crazy, and as crazy regimes usually and unpredictably do, it started to brutalize its people while the world watched in horror as Iranian students were beaten, stabbed and crushed by Bassij militiamen, or worse, shot in plain sight bleeding away on the sidewalk.
The Guardian started to split from within. The reporting side of the paper did a great job exposing the morbid horrors this regime meted out on its citizens while CiF splintered between the apologists who couldn’t believe that their beloved anti-Israel nation has embarrassed them and the reporters who understood that Iran has crossed some, yet still unspecified Rubicon.
So they started to allege foreign intelligence plots being behind the revolt, basically becoming regime mouthpieces. There were also those who, basing it on their western Bolshevik heritage, started to allege that the revolt was only the expression of rich bourgeois kids under the influence of corrupting Western powers while the real man of the people, Ahmadinejad, was denied his democratic victory. Such was the ridiculous yet frightening explanation of Seumas Milne, the Guardian’s resident Stalinist.  Milne also defended the Holocaust denial of the Iranian state as “nothing controversial” in the context of Middle Eastern discourse. He also called western delegates racists for having walked out on the mad president’s speech in Geneva. But as the new revolution gained prominence, fewer and fewer came to the defense of this evil regime.
Then came Obama, Sarkozy and the UN. Iran was caught red-handed building another nuclear site.
Wow.
Leftist softies like Simon Tisdall called it what this was: Iran caught red handed. But the old defenders of the genocidal goals of the Mahdi Cult have resurfaced. This time as often as posters. Case in point was Brian Whitaker who started an ideological decline of late, losing his bearings to put it mildly, by wondering into conspiracy land alleging first that Jewish posters on CiF were Israeli agents and later claiming that this new discovery in a long line of lies by Iran regarding its nuclear program, was again a conspiracy of Western intelligence agencies. As if the Iranians’ reputation preceding this was indication of any other plausible possibility.
Remember, this was after the brutal and often on-camera repression of Iranians during the summer. The rapes and the shootings of protesters.
Still, the crowd, who previously wanted us to believe Ahmadinejad didn’t deny the Holocaust and didn’t say “wipe off the map” was back again, coming to the defense of this menacing regime almost in a concerted effort.
A series of articles ran on CiF, notably an editorial claiming that no military action and no sanctions should be applied in light of the new discovery of another hidden power plant. Only talking.
Talking to liars is the solution according to the Guardian.
The editorial also stated that while Israel has the right to defend itself, it does not in this case because the consequences would have an effect on others as well.
Or something like that.
But the editorial would not be truly visible had it not been preceded by another piece by Stephen Kinzer. The same Kinzer who, on the anniversary of the murder of Bobby Kennedy, ran a eulogy of his killer Sirhan Sirhan whom he characterized as a disappointed weeping victim of the USA’s betrayal of the Palestinians, basically blaming Israel and the Jews for the death of Kennedy at the hands of an Arab assassin who incidentally also shot 4 other people that day, killed the hopes of the Democrats and helped usher in the Nixon presidency. So deep was his conspiracy theory disguised under the literary pretense of a failed novelist, he ended up looking like some third rate Middle East expert enamored with Islam and its false promise of a possible modern world with Islam as its central influence.
Stephen Kinzer, a former NY Times reporter, has been writing a steady trickle of articles, usually lobbying for Turkey as the absolute necessary addition to the EU, or alluding to Iran as some be all and end all solution to the whole Middle East stability “thing”. Needless to say, Kinzer, like many others in coup de foudre with Islamic culture, has started to internalize their myths and through his pretended Middle East scholarly approach to political fantasy journalism, he started repeating them as if those myths were historical reality.
Did I say failed novelist yet?
George Bush, like him or hate him, had excellent nicknames for leaders. For example, he called Hugo Chavez “Castro without brains”. Kinzer is a sort of Seymour Hersh without intellect. While Hersh is informative, if in nothing else but in shedding light on some of the more socially accepted conspiracy theories, Kinzer just creates them and informs nothing of value. In fact, he is a perfect example of a Guardian regular: positing false theories and floating in imagination land, seeing the good in evil and laying the blame on those he criticizes and vilifies when his theories fall short of reality or fall flat altogether.
Case in point, his recent piece My dinner with Ahmedinejad. In this otherwise incomprehensible piece, believe me I tried hard to understand what it was about beside his usual twisting together of feelings of fear and admiration, he explains that while he sat with monsters before, some enlightenment did come to him as he was dining with Mad Mahmoud.
Nothing more came out of the piece aside from explaining that the West’s problems vis a vis Iran are more cultural, thus the negotiations with Iran should be delegated to some old school, and in his view, aged diplomats, who sat with Kinzer at the table breaking bread with Ahmadinejad. This was after the again massive walkout from Mad Mahmoud’s speech at the UN and his repeated Holocaust denial and allegations on Larry King that Neda Sultan was shot by “foreign agents”.
I often think that to some of the liberal cultural elite inhabiting the rent controlled yet still exorbitantly expensive Manhattan apartments, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is a sort of rare, believed to be extinct, yet colorful exotic bird. Hauled back from some far away and scarcely mapped jungle to the enjoyment of watchers fascinated by his supposedly extinct features presented in defiance of previous scholarly work.

– “Look he denies the Holocaust and believes in the end of the world on the heaps of dead Jewish bodies while he smiles and commands many of the poor and downtrodden in the third world.”
-“How fascinating, how dangerously cute”.
-“Can I feed him?”
-“Oh sure just attend his dinner galas, tea will be served and perhaps some Iranian caviar. The Russians cheated out on us of late, Putin wants money for every ounce. “

The exotic Shoah bird flies again.  But they try their their best to deny it, probably thinking it is some acid flashback from ’69 and their radical days.
Alas, no Iran defense would be complete without the rolling out of the real float parade. So here comes George Galloway (again).
This time, now that his anti–Iran benefactor Saddam has died, George has become a host of a talk show on Iran’s state Press TV which ran the most ridiculous propaganda during the Iranian protests and regularly runs Jewish conspiracies and Hezbollah hero stories.  He of course defended the Iranian elections on more than one occasion. No shocker there.
Out he comes on the pages of the Guardian once more.
George alleges that Iran is not working on the bomb, but Sarkozy and Merkel have become Bushists and are plotting to destroy the true nation of universal resistance, Iran, as it is trying to fight for global justice.
This was the essence of his latest speech meant for a rally but probably ending up as a Guardian post. The formats have been interchangeable for a while. Just take off those paragraph ending chants, add some references to one’s self and voila, a Galloway piece for the Guardian is born.
Needless to say, the thread became yet another episode of Monsters with the usual fans of George coming out of the woodwork praising his courage and resolve, while posts alluding to his treasonous hypocrisy and defense of totalitarian terror were deleted and even forewarned by the new and improved moderation which now warns followers to stay on plot or else.
The thread was shut within less than 24 hours, faster than the newest Ben White scribble praising Hamas which usually holds the shut down speed records.
These shut downs have now become symptomatic of a blog which has been caught between its own monster creations and those who call them out for inviting them in with pieces which would make great comedy, were they not in the defense of real monsters staring down real history.
This is why I suppose the Guardian started to hustle the dreamers of a nuclear free world. They do not defend the monsters but defend their own surreal ideals.
Enter Hans Blix. Or as I like to recall him, Hansa Briex. Somehow his most famous moment was indeed in Team America World Police. Not to be a spoiler, but Blix dies in the movie, gets eaten by the pet sharks of KimJong Il, who mocks him for his naiveté and sends him plunging into his shark tank. I still giggle at the memory of that scene, which encapsulated the whole “negotiating with evil madmen” doctrine. Not that there weren’t more serious lessons: Yalta, Munich and Arafat come to mind but still Brixie drove it home without the death of innocents. So Blix comes out on CiF arguing for a nuclear free Middle East. He is basing this on Obama’s famous but now increasingly dangerous speech from Prague where he called for a nuclear free world. A stance Obama repeated at the UN while he was already sitting on the evidence of Iran’s new October surprise, the hidden Qum facility.
Dangerous speech because ever since he spoke those words, the chorus to disarm Israel (on the extreme Left) has started hitting the high notes.
So Blix argues that Israel should basically disarm so that all other Middle East states could follow suit. Hardly a new idea. Probably one which Iran has planned at the outset. Figuring that even if they may not go through with their nuclear ambitions, they will try to leverage their behavior to extract some Western concession around the idea that “all should disarm” for the “sake of our children’s future” and while we’re at it why not of course start with Israel.
I mean who else right?
Blix’s new inspiration would have been more original had Mohamed El Baradei not already communicated the same view sitting next to the Iranian delegation recently where he argued that Israel presents the greatest security threat to the region.
Wow. It is great to know that he was once again, dispatched by Obama and the Security Council to look into that Qum thing. After all he has only withheld evidence twice from the EU and the Americans about what he found in Iran.
Wink wink. He is an “inspector”. He is looking out for us all.
The farce is starting to become old like Benny Hill chasing girls in garter belts around a fake clinic. But it seems, still entertainment for recent Nobel Prize winners basking in the world’s newly found cult of personality.
So the circle is almost complete. The Iranian nuclear issue is really about Israel. This is the Guardian World View.  As those posting and reading CiF for a few years already know, it is (and was) about Israel not Iran and its messianic maniacal leaders who shoot their own people and deny the Holocaust as a matter of foreign policy.
On a side note, Holocaust denial and spreading Jewish conspiracy theory have been Iran’s major contributions to world culture and to the advancement of scholarship in recent years.
But Kinzer would say:

“A Great Culture, can I have some more of that Caviar?”

Israel is the danger and Iran, well, they either are not building the bomb as Whitaker would want us believe or needs the bomb as David Cox argued bluntly a couple of years ago.
But wait. There was another report from the Guardian about Hugo Chavez.
Hugo Hugo what would the Guardian be without you.
The great hero of the Euro Left was joking about building nukes for Iran. It was Guardian humor I suppose.
I mean, what crazy fool would think Chavez, dictator of a country rich with uranium, supporter of Iran and provider of real estate for Hezbollah and the Al Quds Militia, is helping Iran in either skirting sanctions or supplying their nuclear effort materially. Needless to say, this thread also brought out the real comics of CiF.
Who says humor isn’t the great healer.
Here’s a sample of the offering from that thread buried quickly from view:

SeanThorp (111 recommends) …Thank God the Russians and Chinese are thus far resisting the Zionist and Western hysteria. Sanctions on Iraq killed at least half a million children and all the mainstream British political parties are shaping up to do the same to Iran. Why should UK foreign policy be led by a rouge state like Israel? Why would the people of the UK vote for that

There is more but you get the idea. These posts were not moderated for days despite the turbo moderation installed of late. I guess this turbo moderator acts also as an engine filter, programmed to detect defense against antisemitism and Islamic bigotry but letting through any other pollutant.
The only advice I can give to the Guardian, old advice but worth repeating, is:
If you play with fire, you can get either burned or not. But if you play with shit, you certainly will stink and be stained.
“Shit, the Guardian is burning”

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